getting there
Dec. 19th, 2007 02:36 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
adrian_turtleBefore I started working, I was worried about the commute. The distance is scary. Being so unfamiliar with the area (geographically, and in terms of not knowing anybody locally to ask for help) is scary. Long hours are scary. Unspecified long hours where I am susceptible to being pressured because I am trying so hard to prove myself in a new job, new career, new industry I desperately want...that's scary too. Having an ice storm just before my first day nearly took the whole thing over the top from anxiety into a sort of parody of horror-movies.
Friday, I called the HR person to try to confirm my start date, because I had not received the offer letter that was supposed to be in the mail. The HR person was not in the office, because of the storm. I managed to talk to my boss, who said he wanted me to start as soon as possible. I said I would be there Monday, but I might be there in the afternoon instead of the morning if the snow were bad (planning for the worst.) The offer letter arrived Saturday. Nobody else was When Monday came, I fretted because it wasn't *actually* snowing, there were only sheets of ice on the pavement. Would my boss be glad to see me because I'd finished all the HR paperwork and we still had almost 2 hours before afternoon started? Or was he annoyed because I hadn't been there at 8, or because I turned up in his office (even after a long meeting with the HR person) looking like I was going to play in the snow. I had no place to put my coat, or take off my boots or snowpants, or comb/rebraid my hair, until a very friendly new colleague showed me to a closet and washroom.
I've spent most of the last few days reading manuals. It's not very exciting, but it's not scary either. Redbird said last night it sounded like my new manager was being sensible, but the good sense that says new employees need to learn the procedures they will be using is a requirment installed way over my manager's head. It's an industry requirement, and I think it reflects a pervasive structural caution that's part of why I want to work in the industry. I'm also impressed by the structural respect for attention to detail. I'm not poofreading on purpose, only to the extent that I can't help it. I still think it's significant that each time I've caught an error (trivial or potentially significant), people have responded gratefully and started the revision process. I'm accustomed to being shrugged of, or mocked, when I point out orphan clauses or slightly misdirected pointers
This morning, I was supposed to take some time away from reading manuals and shadow the person who is working on The Project. (The Project may have a cutesy nickname someday, when we know each other better. Not yet.) This colleague who is already working on The Project does not start work at 8, but at 7, to facilitate leaving earlier in the afternoon. Scheduling flexibility is something a person has to earn in this organization, and I am on probation for another 88 days. Besides, how much can I impress anybody enough to earn anything by reading manuals? The aforementioned very friendly new colleague explained about the scheduling issue, but reassured me that I was not expected to be there at 7, only at 8.
When I explained about the train arriving too late for me to walk to work by 8, she was shocked. "You WALKED? From the TRAIN station? In THIS?" Well, yeah. Did you look at my wonderful coat, The Resolute? Or my Yaktrax Ice Walkers? I still accepted her offer to drive me to the station yesterday evening. If she came to work early enough, she would be happy to pick me up in the morning, but she works a somewhat later schedule. She suggested our boss, who usually comes in early, would be able to pick me up at the station at 7:40-7:50 if I phoned when the train got in. The drive takes 3-4 minutes, so it would be very little imposition and I'd be there by 8. She phoned him to discuss it, said it would be fine, gave me his cell phone number, then drove me to the station. I went home feeling tired but very hopeful, despite delays on the inbound train I was waiting for.
In the morning, the train was very nearly on time. I phoned my boss cheerfully to ask for that ride, if it was convenient, if he wasn't in the middle of something. He sounded coldly upset. He said he had been waiting at the station for 40 minutes earlier in the morning and I wasn't there, and what was going on? I apologized profusely for the misunderstanding. He sent someone from another department, who said he comes to the station occasionally to fetch one of the engineers (but I didn't quite follow how they work it.) He didn't sound resentful, but it can behard to tell.
After all that effort to be there early enough, the guy working on The Project was out sick today so I could not shadow him. I spent the first 3 hours of my morning sitting at my desk, reading manuals and writing in my notebook, without a word to anybody beyond "good morning." I don't believe it would have made a bit of difference to anything if I'd walked from the station and arrived at the office at 8:30. But turtles on probation are not free to set their own work hours. Taking that into consideration, perhaps I should not be scrambling so hard to read as many manuals as I can before going home. It's not like 8:30-6 can count as being as good as 8-4.
This afternoon, I apologized to my boss for the misunderstanding. I didn't feel like I said anything wrong to cause it, but I thought his attempt to help me had turned into frustration/discomfort/inconvenience and I didn't want him to resent me for his wasted time and energy. He explained why he was so upset, though not anything about why he went to the station so early in the first place. Back in October, when he and I first started talking about this job, he says he asked me if I had transportation. He asked that because he really can't spare somebody's time to go get me every day, the way they did this morning. When he said "transportation," he now says, he meant, "Do you have a car?" (It was fairly clear from his attitude that he felt my response in October deceived him, and he resented it.) This afternoon, I snapped back at him, "I do have a car. It's in the lot behind my apartment building in Arlington, under a sheet of ice. I'll be driving tomorrow, when it's warmer."
(This evening, I looked up his question and my response in my email archive. He actually asked, "Is the intent to commute from Arlington?" I wrote back, "I am planning to commute from Arlington. If the commute turns out to be a problem in the long run, I might move closer, but I would not need to find an apartment before starting work." I wrote "commute" and did not specify car or MBTA. It looks like he lives in a world where commuting means cars, and it's hard if not impossible to go against that default.)
This afternoon, I did not remember the old correspondence in such detail. I simply told my boss that I did have transportation, even when the weather was bad enough that I did not feel safe driving. The commuter rail station is only 2 miles away, and that's an easy walk for me. The only difficulty is getting to work after 8am, but it looks like quite a few people seem to come in at 8:30 or 9. He said rather grudgingly that it might be ok if I came in a few minutes late occasionally, when the weather was very bad. (I decided the hole was deep enough and I ought to stop digging. I thanked him, and said I didn't expect it would be an issue again until after Christmas, anyhow.) The next 2 days are going to be horrible, with a mix of snow and rain. I need to drive through it, though. Because I have places to be in the late afternoon/early evening on this side of town. Not just because I've just discovered my boss considers "driving to work" a kind of job requirement, and it's uncomfortable to negotiate for "driving to work except in severe weather," when I really don't want to do it at all.
Friday, I called the HR person to try to confirm my start date, because I had not received the offer letter that was supposed to be in the mail. The HR person was not in the office, because of the storm. I managed to talk to my boss, who said he wanted me to start as soon as possible. I said I would be there Monday, but I might be there in the afternoon instead of the morning if the snow were bad (planning for the worst.) The offer letter arrived Saturday. Nobody else was When Monday came, I fretted because it wasn't *actually* snowing, there were only sheets of ice on the pavement. Would my boss be glad to see me because I'd finished all the HR paperwork and we still had almost 2 hours before afternoon started? Or was he annoyed because I hadn't been there at 8, or because I turned up in his office (even after a long meeting with the HR person) looking like I was going to play in the snow. I had no place to put my coat, or take off my boots or snowpants, or comb/rebraid my hair, until a very friendly new colleague showed me to a closet and washroom.
I've spent most of the last few days reading manuals. It's not very exciting, but it's not scary either. Redbird said last night it sounded like my new manager was being sensible, but the good sense that says new employees need to learn the procedures they will be using is a requirment installed way over my manager's head. It's an industry requirement, and I think it reflects a pervasive structural caution that's part of why I want to work in the industry. I'm also impressed by the structural respect for attention to detail. I'm not poofreading on purpose, only to the extent that I can't help it. I still think it's significant that each time I've caught an error (trivial or potentially significant), people have responded gratefully and started the revision process. I'm accustomed to being shrugged of, or mocked, when I point out orphan clauses or slightly misdirected pointers
This morning, I was supposed to take some time away from reading manuals and shadow the person who is working on The Project. (The Project may have a cutesy nickname someday, when we know each other better. Not yet.) This colleague who is already working on The Project does not start work at 8, but at 7, to facilitate leaving earlier in the afternoon. Scheduling flexibility is something a person has to earn in this organization, and I am on probation for another 88 days. Besides, how much can I impress anybody enough to earn anything by reading manuals? The aforementioned very friendly new colleague explained about the scheduling issue, but reassured me that I was not expected to be there at 7, only at 8.
When I explained about the train arriving too late for me to walk to work by 8, she was shocked. "You WALKED? From the TRAIN station? In THIS?" Well, yeah. Did you look at my wonderful coat, The Resolute? Or my Yaktrax Ice Walkers? I still accepted her offer to drive me to the station yesterday evening. If she came to work early enough, she would be happy to pick me up in the morning, but she works a somewhat later schedule. She suggested our boss, who usually comes in early, would be able to pick me up at the station at 7:40-7:50 if I phoned when the train got in. The drive takes 3-4 minutes, so it would be very little imposition and I'd be there by 8. She phoned him to discuss it, said it would be fine, gave me his cell phone number, then drove me to the station. I went home feeling tired but very hopeful, despite delays on the inbound train I was waiting for.
In the morning, the train was very nearly on time. I phoned my boss cheerfully to ask for that ride, if it was convenient, if he wasn't in the middle of something. He sounded coldly upset. He said he had been waiting at the station for 40 minutes earlier in the morning and I wasn't there, and what was going on? I apologized profusely for the misunderstanding. He sent someone from another department, who said he comes to the station occasionally to fetch one of the engineers (but I didn't quite follow how they work it.) He didn't sound resentful, but it can behard to tell.
After all that effort to be there early enough, the guy working on The Project was out sick today so I could not shadow him. I spent the first 3 hours of my morning sitting at my desk, reading manuals and writing in my notebook, without a word to anybody beyond "good morning." I don't believe it would have made a bit of difference to anything if I'd walked from the station and arrived at the office at 8:30. But turtles on probation are not free to set their own work hours. Taking that into consideration, perhaps I should not be scrambling so hard to read as many manuals as I can before going home. It's not like 8:30-6 can count as being as good as 8-4.
This afternoon, I apologized to my boss for the misunderstanding. I didn't feel like I said anything wrong to cause it, but I thought his attempt to help me had turned into frustration/discomfort/inconvenience and I didn't want him to resent me for his wasted time and energy. He explained why he was so upset, though not anything about why he went to the station so early in the first place. Back in October, when he and I first started talking about this job, he says he asked me if I had transportation. He asked that because he really can't spare somebody's time to go get me every day, the way they did this morning. When he said "transportation," he now says, he meant, "Do you have a car?" (It was fairly clear from his attitude that he felt my response in October deceived him, and he resented it.) This afternoon, I snapped back at him, "I do have a car. It's in the lot behind my apartment building in Arlington, under a sheet of ice. I'll be driving tomorrow, when it's warmer."
(This evening, I looked up his question and my response in my email archive. He actually asked, "Is the intent to commute from Arlington?" I wrote back, "I am planning to commute from Arlington. If the commute turns out to be a problem in the long run, I might move closer, but I would not need to find an apartment before starting work." I wrote "commute" and did not specify car or MBTA. It looks like he lives in a world where commuting means cars, and it's hard if not impossible to go against that default.)
This afternoon, I did not remember the old correspondence in such detail. I simply told my boss that I did have transportation, even when the weather was bad enough that I did not feel safe driving. The commuter rail station is only 2 miles away, and that's an easy walk for me. The only difficulty is getting to work after 8am, but it looks like quite a few people seem to come in at 8:30 or 9. He said rather grudgingly that it might be ok if I came in a few minutes late occasionally, when the weather was very bad. (I decided the hole was deep enough and I ought to stop digging. I thanked him, and said I didn't expect it would be an issue again until after Christmas, anyhow.) The next 2 days are going to be horrible, with a mix of snow and rain. I need to drive through it, though. Because I have places to be in the late afternoon/early evening on this side of town. Not just because I've just discovered my boss considers "driving to work" a kind of job requirement, and it's uncomfortable to negotiate for "driving to work except in severe weather," when I really don't want to do it at all.
